ONLY WHEN YOU CAN'T

So in late June I had suffered Anosmia (inability to smell) and I had thought it would be for a day or two, so I wasn't really worried. Well, I started panicking when I lost my sense of taste too. 'Heyyyyy I don get Corona virus ooo' Lolzzzz... well, I legit thought so but I didn't have covid19. What I had was a bad cold that was determined to shake me up a little more than I cared for.

So a week had past and I still couldn't smell or taste a thing and I was seriously freaking out in every single way. I never could have imagined that something as simple as smell could cause me so much pain. Pain in the sense that I couldn't taste because I couldn't smell and since I couldn't taste,food became boring to eat and I avoided eating most of the time. 

A week had turned into two and two into three. At this time I wasn't just panicking, I was terrified in every sense of the word and I suddenly had so many "what ifs." But the one that bothered me the most was "what if I never get my senses back?" I had read that it was a possibility. Well, when it was getting to a month and my drugs weren't working much, I knew I had to pray about it. So one evening I broke down in tears in my bath room and these were my words "Dear Lord, I know it doesn't make any sense that I have to worry you over something that will probably take care of itself. Well it's taking too long and I'm scared. You made all the senses,fixing it can't be a problem. so please just fix it. And Lord I promise from now on I will to appreciate more the fact that I can use any part of my body whenever I wanted to. I'm sorry if I have ever taken your free gifts to me for granted, just do this and I will do better."   The next day I was applying rob on my nose and I almost screamed when I smelt it. Although it was the only thing I smelt that day but somehow I was  sure that it will be over soon and it was over in a few days from then.

Only when we can't access the things we were freely given do we realize how much we have misused them or maybe taken them for granted. In that short period of time I found myself mostly wondering how people with disabilities manage through everyday knowing that tomorrow they were still going to be disable. Don't get me wrong, I feel 'sorry' for people with disabilities but I have never really concerned myself with the thought of how they go through each day with their obvious realities. How painful can it be to know that you're going to stay a particular way for life even though you don't want to? It's not nearly easy to live with such reality but we all have life to be grateful for.

You don't have a job,be grateful for the roof over your head. You don't have a child yet, be  grateful you are even married. You are not married yet, be grateful you have a career.  No car? Be grateful you have legs to walk. My point is, be grateful for the little things as much as you are for the big ones. Only when I couldn't use a simple sense of smell did I realize that everything is equally important.