Woke up one morning and suddenly it felt like her head was going to burst. Her heart too heavy from the burden it carried and yet her mouth was sealed with fear that her help cry wouldn't be heard by people so close and yet far away. So she walked slowly to a store and bought a rope strong enough to stop her breath because that was the only hope of freedom she saw.
As she stood in her room, with the rope around her neck and tears running freely down her cheeks, she wondered why she was never thought of by the people whose lives she coloured with her presence and laughter. Why was her tears and pains so invisible? What made everyone careless about her and her feelings? It was in this last moment of reflection that she realized today will not be the day she really dies,she died long ago right before their eyes and they all didn't see it.
So with what seemed like hope,she tightened the rope around her neck and for a moment it felt like someone was finally hugging her pains away, so she closed her eyes and let go of everything. And even though the tightness around her neck made her whole body shake as tears freely rushed down her cheeks,she felt relieved. Her end it was but somehow her death was what it took for folks to realize how important she was to them.....cruel? Nahhh, evil. Humans will be humans. I wished she had known that hope is life which is a free gift from God and stayed alive for her own sake. Suicide is never an option except that this was not a suicide... Let's call it what it is, this was murder.
The neglect she suffered from all of you pushed her to her breaking point but still she managed to smile, dance around the room and make you happy day after day.
You all are wolves, you fed on her until she had nothing else to give but her life.
She worried about you but how much did you worry about her?
She went through all your stuff with you and made sure you came out strong but how many times where you there with her when life hit her hard?..... Now sit around like babies and cry like you care. Lie to yourselves that you didn't see the signs that she was broken. Yes she laughed alot but even her laughter carried a piece of her pain,how did you not see that? Her eyes were flashing with regret and fear but as far as she eased your worries with her warmth,you all couldn't be bothered about her. Oh well " it's her, she is always fine". She is fine in her grave now and as you pay your last respect, know that this was more of a murder than suicide and your neglect killed her, the rope only put her in the grave.
I really wished I could have stopped her. I wished I was there for her like she deserved but unlike you all, the ungrateful and selfish lots, I was just her Dairy, a book on whose pages she stored her thoughts,her pains and regrets. Awful murderers you all are, now move on with your lives like she was never here.
From diary to you: check on your dear ones, even those that seem happy and full of life. Take time to listen to them when they are talking and when they are not.
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